Over a month since my last post

I wish I could say, after a month's long absence, that I have something to whine about besides my fucked up co-workers treating me like a desk monkey, or some of the kids at school acting like a bunch of cackling chickens with gossip and drama... but no. Not today.



Today, the California State Supreme Court has deemed the ban on same-sex marriage as unconstitutional. I nearly pee'd in my pants when the news was shared on CNN.com. I am so frakkin' happy - although I wish this happened while my partner and I were still in CA and got married back in 2006.

How does it feel to be the "Govunur of Caleefonia" now Arnold?

Thomas Beatie no match for Arnold Schwarzenegger

Thomas Beatie, the "man" who has been deemed as legitimately pregnant, has received mixed reactions nationwide. I for one don't have mixed feelings about her pregnancy. Yes, I am still calling Thomas a "she." I can get away with this. I am a Lesbian and as a member of the LGBT community, I can talk. Thomas Beatie is a Transgender individual. Thomas underwent "the change" about ten years ago; having the breasts removed, there is no possibility for breast-feeding for the baby... or is there? That's issue number one. Number two: even though Thomas changed her legal status so that she may identify and be identified as being a man, she still has the makings of a female, regardless of taking testosterone.

Yes, there's facial hair. Yes, the boobs are gone. Yes, there's a shit-load of armpit hair and elsewhere. BUT... there is no penis. Members of the transgender community have always had a hard time finding a group where they could be accepted, so the Gays and Lesbians took them in... and of course the bi-sexuals became part of the family. No harm done... we gave them a home so to speak. But many have an issue with one main factor - they are only man or woman (whatever they switch to) on the outside. They "feel" like a man or a woman so they want that equal respect accordingly. That's fine. I can accept that. But the media has managed to egg on the controversy even more so by saying that Thomas, as a man, is pregnant. This is not accepted nationwide as not everyone acknowledges "the change," especially the assholes known as homophobics. I find it interesting that Thomas and her partner Nancy came to the decision that Thomas should carry instead of the Nancy who is more than obvious the female role in the couple. No one has bothered to mention the mild possibility that the baby may come out with any possible abnormalities due to the fact that Thomas had been taking testosterone and it's in her system. There are certain forms of nourishment that only a true female body can provide to an unborn fetus, taking into consideration that the woman is in good health and doesn't abuse drugs/ alcohol.

Anyone ever see the movie Junior starring Arnold Schwarzenegger? Now that is over-the-top, and it's to be expected. It was entertaining and not to mention hilarious because, well, it's Arnold! If men were intended to have babies, too, then some women have been going through hell for nothing. I'd like to see the day when women could knock-up men. See how they like it... And no, I'm not a man-hater. I have a best friend who is a man.

I feel for Thomas. I really do. But as long as Thomas has a vagina, Thomas is not a pregnant man. I would really prefer that the media did the over-the-top type stories about a man being pregnant on the National Enquirer or other similar magazines just for the sake of gossip or hearsay. Now that Thomas and Nancy have made an appearance on Oprah, I can almost see the hamster wheel turning in her head, "Now I'm really a man that is pregnant." Sorry, Thomas. But to me you're still all woman with a haircut just like mine, with a little extra body hair.

Clinton's schedule as First Lady - WE MUST KNOW!

It's plastered all over CNN and FOX News. "Click here to see Clinton's schedule as First Lady." "Click here to see where Clinton was during Bill's sexual encounter with Monica Lewinsky." Give me a freakin' break people! ALERT THE MEDIA!!! Hillary Clinton was in the White House when Bill and Monica were getting friendly with a cigar! Have they gone mad? This was 10 years ago! Let... it... GO! I don't care where she was when Bill was thinking up ways to say, "I... did not... have sexual relations with that woman." What the hell does that have to do with her present-day advance in the elections? Oh that's right! Sorry-ass Obama has to think up ways to side-track her to make her lose focus. All he's accomplished is helping those who can't stand him to not be able to stand him even more... AND gave us all a good laugh. CNN, shame on you for even allowing this in your headlines. The Whaaaambulance stopped and took a good look and decided to leave you, the media, on the sidewalk because you're too pathetic to even be picked up and treated. There is no hope for you.

A month away, and no word?

Nearly a month later after my last post... NOTHING has changed. Well, except that I've put on some weight, but hey, that's what overeating due to boredom causes.

I wish I could say that things have improved at my job, but they haven't. I'm still babysitting. One of the bad apples has recently spread the word that they're going to be working for our firm on a contractural basis for the next four months at around two days a week. After that, no more! It could mean less stress for me, but that's not the case. We're going to be relocating to a new office this summer, and the planning and organizing falls solely on my shoulders. whoop-de-fucking-whoop.

So far, the part I have been hating the most about work is answering the damn phone. About 70% of the callers are rude and never give their name when they ask for someone in the office. Those who do give their name drag it out to be a life story - by the time they're saying what company they're calling from, I'm ready to hang up. I have to move on to better things to complain about I guess.

My mom and I email each other everyday. Today, we've talked about what would happen to her if my dad were to die and visa versa. She's put it in black and white what she wants to have done when she passes away and even discussed her life insurance. As awkward and painful as it was to discuss it, I was glad she talked to me about it because now I know exactly how much she trusts me. We've also been going over how bitter we are with my brother and sister-in-law. I'm seemingly having a tougher time getting past their ways of living as heartless idiots, not to say my mom isn't, but she has a more practical approach to things than I do.

I've made a lot of decisions in the past two hours concerning my family. One is that I will never reconcile with my brother because of my sister-in-law. They care more about money; at the same time they go around acting like they're "holier than thou" and they're such good Christians, yet that talk so much crap! I shouldn't be surprised really. They seem to care only about themselves and money. After hearing and knowing all of what my mom had done for him, I'm almost completely ashamed to call him my brother.

Family feuds suck.

Work sucks.

Shit happens.

State vs. Church, again, and again, and again...

You know, after reading up on how and when God was included in the Pledge of Allegiance. This was originally authored by a Christian Socialist author and Baptist minister Francis Bellamy on September 7, 1892 and was meant to be simply: "I Pledge allegiance to my Flag, and to the Republic for which it stands: one Nation indivisible, With Liberty and Justice for all." But then the group called Knights of Columbus, based out of New York felt the need to add a sense of deity, hence the words, "under God." Then there's the the line "In God we trust" on our currency. So much for holding up the Separation of Church from State.

A nobody-atheist in CA is in the progress of filing a lawsuit because of his daughter being forced to recite the Pledge of Allegiance and since "In God we Trust" is all over our money, he feels his rights have been violated. I've got the perfect solution. USE MONOPOLY MONEY! The government has kept things a certain way to follow tradition, etcetera, etcetera, blah blah blah. So why in the hell are people feeling the need NOW to make a big deal about this crap? Are they that needy for attention? Hell, just don't recite the damn thing and don't use money! It's as simple as that!

"History... Will... Absolve me!"

Fidel Castro is fiddlin' on his fiddle of "woe is me" at home now that he has stepped down as Cuba's notorious ruler after nearly 50 years of ruthless dictatorship. The people of Cuba may say they love the man for what he did, but how many times were they threatened if they were to say otherwise?

Castro is said to have resigned due to his continuing failing health. The man is at the ripe age of 81 years. He could've stepped down decades ago, but as the saying goes, "Power never quenches your thirst." He needed more and it was never enough. Let's see... In 2004 he broke his knee and fractured his arm in a fall during a televised public speech. In August 2006 he “temporarily” handed over power to his brother, defense minister Raúl, after an operation to stop intestinal bleeding. There are still lingering problems related to his intestinal health. Will history truly absolve this Cuban so that he can be recognized more for doing good than harm? Or will this new situation shed light and have karma give him several swift kicks in the arse?

Sandals require skin, not socks!

Frakkin' idiots... I swear, the next time I see a set of feet with socks and sandals on, specifically Teva's and Birkenstock's, I'm chaining their feet down!

Sandals are meant to be worn like an open-toe shoe. You expose your feet for air while having the bottom protected. If your feet are cold, then don't fucking wear sandals! If you want that extra comfort and lightness that a shoe can't provide, wear socks with Crocs!


Jesus people, whatever happened to common sense? Not to mention fashion sense!

The Obese don't get to eat anymore!

Mississippi food joints (mostly diners) are considering on not feeding those who they feel are obese thanks to a fucked-in-the-head State lawmaker who deemed that notion to be necessary. Okay, uh, last I checked, obesity is not always caused by overeating! Fucking bastards... And in Mississippi of all places! Don't a lot of folks in Mississippi love soul-food type dishes and hunting? Gimme a break? Anyone how decides to not feed the allegedly obese - and I say this loosely because some people are considered to be when really they're not - then they're mentally constipated shit heads.

Now Hiring - Tax Season Suckers!

On my way back to work from the clinic, the bus drove by a couple of buildings where there were independent versions of H&R Block. In front of their offices was a guy dressed up like Uncle Sam, holding a picket sign trying to get people's attention to go to their company for tax services. It was a mere 35 degrees with wind chill of 20 - the wind was kicking but the guy looked like he was having a blast regardless. Several feet down on the same side of the street, I saw another arm carrying a similar picket sign for the same deal, so I thought, "Damn, how many Uncle Sams do you need?" But wasn't Uncle Sam. This guy looked hideous. He looked like he was ready to beat the crap out of Uncle Sam and was about to thrust his picket sign into his own head. This guy was dressed up as Lady Liberty. His face looked like he hadn't shaved in a week and his hair was coarse and dark black while his face was pale white. He stood there, grimmacing at Uncle Sam as though he was saying, "Stop hopping and popping around, or I'll take your top hat and shove it up your ass." This guy stood in one spot. His sign was planted on the sidewalk. I nearly pissed in my pants from laughing so hard. The lesson here is: Find a desperate female to wear Lady Liberty's outfit if they're that hard up for money. The guy was an insult to Liberty's beauty.

Hypertension's a B-I-T-C-H!

Hypertension runs in my family. My mom was diagnosed with it when I was very young. My dad was diagnosed about 4 or 5 years ago. Yesterday, I found out I have it. I'll be 30 in August. No, it's NOT normal to have it at my age, but the fact of the matter is, I have it and now I'm on meds for it. Right now, my head feels like a dozen jackhammers going at it. On top of that, my new doc made me get a flu shot, so my whole body hurts no matter which way I move. It hurts to type even now as we speak. It hurts if you touch my hair... and the sun, which decided to show itself in our 35 degree weather in the Pearl District, is making it worse for me. One of many side effects of my new medication is sensitivity to sunlight. The others like headache, dizziness, excessive urination, I've got it all. Great. Wonderful. Fucking peachy. I'm stoked. No really I am. What better place to suffer from all this shit than at the workplace!

Rear-ending someone while DUI, and you go free!

I got rear-ended on Sunday by this idiot driving his white Toyota Celica. I was at Clackamas Town Center - my wife and I were planning on seeing a movie so I stopped at a stop sign to let her out so she could take down the movie titles and times. As she reached for a pen, BOOM! My neck was in immediate pain. I yelled out, "FUUUUCK!" which we laughed about later on. I quickly got out of the car to assess the damage. I had a few knicks in the rear bumper and some white paing from the guys car. The guy didn't even want my insurance info but I made him take it anyway. He stared at my driver's license for a good 10 seconds, trying to figure out what was my first and last name. The next thing I knew, as I stood next to him to watch him write stuff down on a piece of paper, I noticed that he was reeking of alcohol. My head was throbbing by this point. After we were done exchanging all the bullshit, he drove off from behind me, cutting me off, pulling into the parking log to our left, almost hitting two other vehicles, one being a huge truck. The asshole had no shame. I called my insurance company and left a message, then I called the non-emergency number to Clackamas Police to report the guy's reckless driving and his DUI condition. Meanwhile, I find out that the insurance company doesn't care of the driver was DUI and rear-ended me because the damage wasn't extensive. WTF? Do you want my car to be in a total wreck in order to take action? I don't have a $500 deductible for my health!

Last thought before I went to bed... "I'm a jackass."

One of the rules my wife and I have between the two of us is that we are never to go to bed upset with each other. Last night that rule apparently didn't apply. I got upset because she did something I didn't like. It's not like I have a choice in the matter and I'm not about to tell her she can't do it anymore because I'm not the boss of her and I'm in no position to run her life. However, it did in fact make me feel like shit, like a mediocre ant scrambling to survive, useless and in a way, worthless. I naturally reacted in my usual human nature-like way and in turn was indirectly confronted in passing, hearing the statement, "I don't know what your fucking problem is..." and later being called a jackass shortly before she fell asleep. She was okay with that. I got up and left the room quietly and fled to the living room where I shed tears for an hour and eventually fell asleep on the couch while watching the History Channel around 3 AM.

The note I fell asleep on was a nasty one and I felt I was a jackass only because I didn't stand up for myself. I still feel the same as I did last night and typically I feel better after sleeping on it. But not today. I'm still trying to get over the fact that we went to sleep like that and had the world ended in our sleep, that would've been my last thought of her. Calling me a jackass, and I felt as though I don't satisfy her as her wife.

Restroom sharing doesn't mean to leave a surprise behind.

I never, ever had a problem sharing the bathroom with family... EVER. There were many jobs I held in the past where the restrooms were impeccably clean and elegantly sweet-smelling. There were jobs where the restroom situation was that of a port-o-potty from the Dyke March in San Francisco... mostly because the the job site was under construction. When I worked at the SF Hilton as a security guard, I had the pleasant experience of having to help with a biohazard clean up because of blood that was smeared all over the door, handicap handles and on the floor... but NOT on the toilet! Well, in my job now, I have the pleasant experience of seeing droplets of piss being left behind... And sometimes even fucking pubic hair. I may be in charge of cleaning up a lot of things, but I will NOT clean the toilet. That's why we have a janitorial service twice a week. But damn! I want to use the toilet... and we don't have seat covers! Well, squatting is good for the legs I suppose. My thing is, if you use it, you clean it. The best thing that comes out of the restroom is the fact that the men remember to lower the seat when they're done.

Scientists vs. The Mayans

So my dumb ass got all caught up with researching the date December 21, 2012. According to the Mayan calendar, which ends on that date, that is supposedly when the world in going to end, whether it be by a natural catastrophe or by man's hand. Then you have a handful of other myths following this same path from the Bible Code and Nostrodamus. You have NASA and affliated scientists who say that the Earth will come approximately 30,000 miles close to a deadly asteroid if not collide with it, in the year 2028. British scientists say the same thing only for the year 2019. Here are my issues: One: no one really knows when the world is going to end. Two: why in God's name are people so adamant on creating such chaos, mass hysteria and panic with the public? And three: I don't want to die (not like I can help it of course) until I'm well into my 70's. I'm scared shitless when it comes to death. I want to be able to get old with my wife - have that family we always talk about. The reason why I'm so afraid of death and end of the world crap is because of exactly that. I'm so afraid that I won't get to accomplish all that I ever aspire to do. Whenever we talk about long term future plans, I get this lump in my throat and nasty gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach because I'm always afraid that we won't live long enough to see those things happen. I don't care if you think I'm sick in the head for feeling this way, but it's the truth. No one wants to world to end and no one wants to die, unless they have their own personal reasons for wanting to... but I for one want to fall in a different category. All I can do is try to stop thinking about it, but it's so difficult when you have people posting websites left and right covering more about the gruesome end we may face, rather than seeing people give any alternative facts or ideas to list the cons of those sick myths. Yes. I'm freaking out... Quietly.

Back to babysitting after the holidays

I don't care how many years an Admin person has been in the business. I will say this once and for all. Being an Office Manager is the EXACT same thing as being a babysitter. The main downfall is that the majority of the people you end up babysitting are older than you are, for the most part. I swear... I come back to the office after a nice, long, much-needed vacation, and the first thing I hear from one of the same, typical whiners is, "It isn't working," and, "Can you get more of this?" Christ people! How about trying this for a change, "Hey! How was your Christmas and New Year's? Did you have fun on vacation? Did you go anywhere?" But I guess it takes more effort to be nice to someone unless you see some sort of benefit for yourself. It's obviously much easier for them to ask/ demand what they need/ want. It takes up less energy and brain activity... Not a whole lot of thought involved.

Restore America, Rulers of the Homophobic

Recently, a Bill that was passed in the state of Oregon for Domestic Partnership, allowing an additional 500 Civil Rights to Gays and Lesbians, was halted by a Federal Court judge. The Bill, which was to allow Domestic Partners to be joined in Civil Union and be certfied was brought to a halt because of a Tenessee-based, far-right group called Restore America. Basically, they were bitching left and right (although considering how pathetic they are, they don't know left from right)because well, they don't like the gays. They circulated a petition to collect enough signatures in order to have the Bill sent to the voters. When the petition reached the state of Oregon, those who reviewed the signatures and found several to be invalid and therefore tossed it out the window so to speak. In retaliation, Restore America turned around and filed a lawsuit against the state of Oregon, claiming that the procedures used with the petition review was illegal and unjust. This prompted the Federal Court judge to put everything on hold. Okay, so stop me if I'm wrong. Restore America is basically suing Oregon because they didn't get what they want, right? I mean, there is a difference between state law and federal law. It was illegal in their eyes because they view homosexuality as illegal. Whaaaa-freakity-whaaaa! Fuck you Restore America. Here's a quarter... Go call somebody who cares. They not only need the Whaaaambulance, they also need a Petty Wagon, a lifetime supply of tissue for their issue, and shit load of toilets to spew their shit-ridden mouths into. Am I bitter? No! Not at all!