Whoopi makes a statement on her first day on The View

I sure said "Whoopeee" when I heard that Whoopi Goldberg was Barbara Walter's new pick for The View. I love her as much, if not more, as Rosie O'Donnell.

On her first day with members of The View, Whoopi had made a statement that sounded as though she was defending Michael Vick, of the NFL team Atlanta Falcons. She compared the fact that dogfighting in the south is like cockfighting in Puerto Rico. Guess what my friends? She's right! Whoopi merely stated a fact... she was by no means attempting to side with anyone. She made a statement, shared her "view" if you will, with America, which is what Barbara brought her on board for. Fellow hostess Joy Behar appeared to be livid with Goldberg's statement, shooting back the question, "How about dog torture and dog murdering?" Goldberg stood her ground and stuck to her guns. I'm glad she said this because people are forgetting, Vick did something that has nothing to do with his career, nor was there any human lives at stake. However, it does not make it okay for people to cause harm to any kind of animal, period. He, like the rest of us, is only human. As Whoopi said, as soon as Vick realized that America did not condone his actions, he admitted to wrong-doing and dealt with the consequences accordingly. Now, drop it people... including you, Joy. 7 out of 10 - call the Whaaaambulance on these peeps who can't seem to move on - I give much kudos to Whoopi.

Jerry Lewis' anti-gay slur on annual telethon

Excuse the guy... he's 81 years old now.

Jerry made a joke towards his camera man, "part of the telethon family," referring to someone named "Bart" who is an illiterate fag." Not only did Jerry apologize quickly and expeditiously, but he meant every word. You have to understand, he's been there, done that. He can get away with this. GLAAD (Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation) got real jumpy at his comment and immediately said it was "unacceptable." Yes, we know, GLAAD, but guess what? Comedians have to make a living, too. 6 out of 10... sorry GLAAD, but you can't let too much power get to your heads.

Rhode Island man tries to get even with mom by threatening to kidnap… her CAT?

Garry Lamar, a 47-year old grown-ass man, decides to hold a grudge with his mother, 78-year old Mary Lamar Grancher, for kicking him out of the house due to reported abusive behavior. Because Mary was just continuing to be “mom,” he got pissed off and decided to threaten to kidnap her cat, her only true companion as she lives alone, and in the end squeezed out $20 grand from her. He was released last week on $200 bail and ordered to stay away. WTF? P-p-p-p-pa-the-tic! Garry, get a flippin’ life and leave your elder mom alone! She kicked your ass out… you need to find your place and live your own life, without her and the cat. 10 for the oldest cry baby in Rhode Island!

China policemen don’t like hugs?

Two individuals were detained by Chinese police near Jinshi, China for hugging in public. They were celebrating the Chinese version of Valentine’s Day, known as Qi Xi, amongst other couples who were showing various forms of affections. The two were separated by police for questioning and then taken into the station; they were not released until the fine of 5000 Yuan was paid – the equivalent to $660 dollars. I know the Chinese have their ways, but, don’t they know where kids come from? Without the hugging, there’d be no kissing… without the kissing, there’d be no fondling… no fondling, no fornication. I guess they just want it saved for the bedroom. Screw public affection! It’s all about hands-in-pockets! 10 for these cry-babies… I hope the two lovers got their money back.

Convicted peeper Marin man wants his porn back

Dennis Saunders, age 59, of San Rafael, is bitter because San Rafael Police confiscated some 500 porn movies and 250 magazines during a recent investigation which led to his conviction for peeping in and video taping a woman and teenage girl. Saunders’ lawyer’s argument on his behalf is that he’s entitled to his extensive porn collection since it has nothing to do with the case against him; the collection is said to be worth some $10K. Saunders apparently added to his wrap sheet back in ’02 which is when he was caught taping the 45-year old woman and 16-year old girl in their bedrooms and bathrooms at the apartment complex where he worked. On top of that were 48 additional counts of misdemeanors connected to sentencing of more than 8 years, which dates back to 1979. He had been released last month for good behavior. Um, hello? Whatever happened to conducting thorough background checks when hiring people? Dennis, darling, if you are in such need of porn in your life, just go and buy yourself a new collection and take lesson from the Birthday Suit man from Indiana… grab yourself a jar of Vasoline™ and rub one out in the comforts of your own home, away from the windows preferably. 9 out of 10 for Mr. Whack Job.

Multitasking while driving does not include the application of petroleum jelly or masturbation

An Indiana man, who decided to visit dear ol’ Ma in Ohio, felt comfortable enough to drive in his birthday suit towards the Indiana Toll Road, along with petroleum jelly on his hands. Motorists passing by this pro-nudity guy had allegedly “seen” enough that they were provoked to call local authorities. I wonder how long they actually watched him before calling State Troopers. So the guy was taken in for misdemeanor indecent exposure but was later released on a $1000 bond. 8 out of 10 - Would he have been caught with tinted windows, I wonder. Wouldn’t one have the same bit of privacy in their vehicle as they would inside a house? I mean, there’s peeping toms everywhere, looking into windows… those perverts should be thrown into jail, too, unless they’re paying to watch.

See what happens when you mess with Cheetos™?

A guy from Des Moines decides that while he’s high off of Meth, he’s gonna throw a bag of Cheetos™ at his dad’s face for no apparent reason. Well the result was a cut to the bridge of the dad’s nose from his eye glasses. Yeah… dude got arrested for domestic assault. Now who throws Cheetos™ at a person they’re mad at, really? I mean, at least use Pringles – the canister will at least cause more damage! I wonder if he opened the bag first. A “cheeto-eye” wouldn’t exactly feel comfortable I’m sure… 7 out of 10 for the Attack of the Killer Cheetos!

If you say “good morning” or “hello” to someone and they don’t answer you…

Well really, what do you do in those situations? It can be awkward, annoying, and not to mention, you feel slightly embarrassed, right? Well, I’ve got a handful of people in my office who like to come in through the front door and have this look of resentment. I can almost see the chaos running through their heads. Granted I’m not exactly a morning person, but it is part of my responsibility to meet and greet people as they come in. The problem is that they make my job more difficult by not replying. At least make eye contact with me for God’s sakes! Most of them have the tendency to just walk right by – and I’m no exactly quiet – my voice carries. I say, “Good morning!” with a rather cheery disposition (it is first thing in the morning, let’s get the day off to a good start), and all I get is their face staring at the floor and the look of “I want to beat the shit out of someone.” I’ve gotta meet and greet, so they better see and eat it!

Computers and Search engines… are they really helpful?

I haven’t written any blogs for almost a week because, well, I have a job. When you have a job, you’re supposed to work and work and work. But I didn’t even do that. I spent most of my time blogging and answering surveys on MySpace.com. Yes, it’s addictive. But that alone kept me busier than the office did. That and Popcap.com. I can’t get enough of the online games. What I hate is why my computer won’t let me download Yahoo IM unless I use the ever-so-slow Yahoo Beta email format. God it sucks. And talk about trying to bite off of Mac computers… has anyone noticed any similarities between Mac and Windows Vista? One is obviously a brain twister; the other is user friendly to any age range. Take your pick: work hard to get what you want, or take a short cut to get it over and done with. Why can’t every computer program just have ESP where they know what we want and just give it to us? Why so much typing and clicking to get to several links where we still have to figure out what the hell it is we’re looking for? I put in a search link to find pictures of crying babies, and Google gives me several porn links. Don’t they know I have a job I need to keep?