Notorious chocolate craving – and it isn’t even PMS time…

For the past 3 months, I’ve been getting these strange cravings right around the same time of day – just before lunch and just after dinner. My body has been in strong need of chocolate. I’ve tried to fix the craving by drinking the hot chocolate that the office provides, but it doesn’t cut it. I try not to buy any chocolate, but anytime I’m sent out on an errand, it’s hard not to get anything. We’re talking a plethora of chocolate, ranging from Cadbury™ Fruit & Nut, Caramello™, Irish Crème, and English Toffee flavors… then Twix™, Milky Way™, Whoppers™, Mr. Goodbar™… I’m like, “WHY GOD? WHY?” When I actually able to have my chocolate fix, I find myself with the ability to finish all of what I have in one sitting. How is this healthy? When I’m done, I drink a shit load of water, not that it washes away the bad stuff. When I am unable to have a fix, I want to get high. When I can’t even get into that state, I sit like a zombie. Why can’t chocolate come as easy as running water?

STOP REQUESTED

Many of you who take public transportation know and understand the importance of pulling the string on the bus that helps you get off at your stop. Once you hear, “DING!” you know you’re getting ready to off-board. Just to make sure, you look up to see if the STOP REQUESTED sign lit up in red… and it did. Well, in a perfect world the bus driver knows that someone wants to get off at the next stop. For the second time in a week, my bus driver went past my stop and went to the next which is 4 city blocks away, as opposed to my actual stop which takes me half a block away from my office. Either the man is deaf or he’s losing his touch. He has been my driver for the past month and knows where I get off – everyday. Maybe the STOP REQUESTED sign should be right on his steering wheel where he will see it no matter what… on that same note, the “DING” should be amplified right above him – he does use a microphone to announce the important stops… if we have to hear him, he should hear us, too! I don’t like screaming for the bus to stop, it creates too much attention. Next time, I’ll just yell out, “DING! DING! DING! DING! DING! DING!” Nah, never mind. Someone will think they won something.

Getting cozy on public transportation

Picture this: You get on your bus. It was about 5 minutes late. With every one of those extra minutes is an extra person more than usual so it’s fuller. You’ve got one seat available towards the back – one of the ones that are connected to two other seats and face the exit door of the bus. You sit down, relieved that you don’t have to stand with the rest of packed sardines.

Okay, now that you have that visual, check this out: so I sit down and get my bag situated on my lap so I don’t bump into the guy to my left (the wall separating me from the upstairs section of the bus was to my right). I closed my eyes to listen to Sang.Rael, absorbing every note to “Inside of You.” Next thing I know, the guy starts to “adjust” himself and his seated position, causing him to bump into my arm several times. I leaned up against the wall as much as I could so I wouldn’t have to touch him. Instead, the asshole decides he’s going to lean on me even more. WTF? So, I scooted up and away from the back of my seat so that I was practically at the edge. He opened his eyes, looked at me and said something but I couldn’t hear with the headphones on. Then he got up, sat back down and purposely rubbed up against me, again, only this time, he knocked my bag off my lap. I stood up, looked down at him and said, “Can I get you a bed? The roof of the bus is pretty flat!” Muthaf*cka said nothing. What is this need some people have to touch a total stranger on the bus? I was sleepy, too, but I wasn’t about to lean on a white man dressed in stained Dockers™ that were too tight in the crotch. 8 out of 10 for the man in need of “bus rubbing.”